When Retirement Turns Into Parenthood Again
For Connie and Michael Frost, retirement was supposed to mean enjoying an empty nest. Instead, the Georgia couple found themselves raising their granddaughter Kinsley, who came into their care when she was 2 and is now 13.
The couple eventually received permanent custody and discovered that raising a child again meant rethinking both their finances and their future. Michael, 67, had retired in 2010, but the family has had to find additional income through rental properties, farming and other work while facing expenses including medical and dental bills. As Michael put it, “there was nobody else willing to do it.”
The Frosts’ story illustrates a reality that can easily disappear from mainstream conversations about parenting: sometimes the people doing the parenting are grandparents.
Raising Grandchildren Comes With a Unique Set of Challenges
Grandparents who become primary caregivers can face financial pressure, physical demands and emotional stress at a time when they expected to be preparing for retirement rather than another 18 years of raising a child.
A 2024 study of grandfamilies found that more than 2.4 million grandparents are responsible for raising their grandchildren, with many experiencing financial hardship and high levels of stress. The study also found that parenting stress and dysfunctional parenting were associated with child behavioral outcomes, highlighting how much support these families may need.
There can also be complicated family dynamics, legal issues and the emotional challenges of caring for children who may have experienced trauma, parental substance use or instability. Grandparents may simultaneously be coping with their own aging, health concerns and the loss of the retirement they had imagined.
Millions of Children Are Part of Grandfamilies
In spite of the millions of “Grandfamilies” out there, research collected by McMaster University shows that these Grandparent caregivers can be overlooked by a parenting culture largely built around younger parents. McMaster’s review found that grandparents raising grandchildren can experience “burnout, stress, anxiety and depression,” while support groups, education and professional assistance can improve their well-being.
Grandparents raising children aren’t simply helping out—they are parents, often under extraordinary circumstances. Recognizing them as part of the parenting community is an important first step toward making sure they don’t have to navigate that responsibility alone.
