We’re all looking for ways to save money and keep our kids entertained, but the internet has come together to inform one mom that her method is not only unacceptable, but disrespectful and entitled.
She explains in a now-deleted video that her “hack” is to take her child to a store and let her fill up a basket with anything and everything she wants. When they get to the register, the mom narrows the selection down to a few items and leaves the employee to put the rest back!
That’s not all—when she was called out for her behavior, she uploaded another video complaining that retail employees are just too lazy to do their jobs!
The “Hack” Involves Making Extra Work For Other People
In a now-deleted video, a mom explained that she takes her child to a store (she says “Dollar Store” but the images from the video show a Five Below) and allows her to load up the basket with whatever she likes. Then, at the register, she picks out a few items and leaves the rest to be returned to the shelf.
In her further video defending herself, the mom argues that she “sometimes” puts the items back herself, but that she just “asks” the employee to help if she doesn’t have time.
Unfortunately, we don’t have the full video since it was deleted, but a TikTok user going by the name “Unplugged Moments” managed to download a copy and has shared a version with her own commentary, which you can see below.
This Mom Is Outraged At The Feedback She Received
In the shared video, the original poster defends herself. She seems to believe that everyone who told her she was selfish and rude was just making excuses for retail employees who don’t want to do their jobs—which includes putting items back.
Current and former retail employees (including one who says she works retail as a second job in addition to teaching) are weighing in to offer nuance:
“Sure, helping out customers is their job, but YTA (the entitled mom) for increasing their workload on purpose.”
(“YTA” comes from a Reddit sub in which commenters are invited to determine who in a given scenario is the bad guy, and it stands for “you’re the a**hole.”)
Retail Jobs Are Usually Multifaceted
As many commenters point out, most retail establishments are understaffed, more so than ever since the pandemic.
That means that one employee might be expected to run the cash register and stock shelves between customers, return unwanted items to their shelves, keep an eye out for shoplifting or other suspicious behavior, and clean up any messes that occur. One employee shared in the comment section that they have only an hour after the store closes to get all the “go backs” put away, which is complicated when customers dump baskets full of items they knew they didn’t want when they picked them up.
Being underpaid and overworked frustrates employees at dollar stores and discount shops so much that they’ve staged walkouts. In Wisconsin, the entire staff of one Dollar General walked out, according to NBC Chicago, leaving a note that read:
“The store is CLOSED. The whole team has walked away due to a lack of appreciation, being overworked and being underpaid…We QUIT! Thank you to our amazing customers. We love you and will miss you.”
Dollar Stores Are Actually Great For Teaching Your Child Budgeting
My version of the parenting “hack” involving a dollar store is to take my kids into Dollar Tree and tell them each can pick out one snack item, drink, and toy or fun item. We walk out of the store with the same number of items per kid that the original poster describes in her video, without leaving behind many items for the cashier to deal with.
Other parents in the comments describe similar practices, generally involving telling a child how much they’re allowed to spend and making it a lesson in budgeting. It’s a valuable life skill, after all. One parent suggested:
“Or, hear me out! Tell the child they can only pick 2 items! Then when they reach 4 a 3rd, u remind they have 2 already, & tell them they can either switch one out, or put that 1 back! Lord some ppl!”
Some commenters pointed out that it’s also far more honest to give your kid a limit in advance and stick to it. One said:
‘I think it’s almost even worse to trick the kid that she gets the things that she has picked out. I mean, that is really not nice to the kid.”
Lying To Kids As A Routine Practice Is Also Damaging
It’s not 100% clear whether the original poster’s child knows in advance that she’ll only get a few of the items she piles in her basket or if she genuinely believes she’s getting the shopping spree of a lifetime every time they go to the store. The latter seems to be the implication, though; other parents are responding strongly to that.
They’re right — if the mom in the video is lying to her child about their shopping plans day after day, she’s probably doing damage to their relationship and affecting the child’s development. Parenting Science explains:
“The evidence suggests that kids [who are lied to by adults] may become more dishonest with us, and not only that: When we make a practice of telling children lies, kids may be at a higher risk of developing aggressive and antisocial behavior problems.”
They cite a series of studies that show kids may take adults’ lies as a “green light” to use lies themselves for the same purposes — control, manipulation, and other self-serving interests.
So, A Parenting Hack For Dollar Stores?
There’s a great way to use dollar stores to teach your kids important life skills: Simply take them to a dollar store (or really, any store that’s in your budget) and model good behavior, budgeting, self-control, and kindness to retail employees for them.
Demonstrate to them the way you show respect for the employee’s time and effort, put unwanted items back where you found them, and only buy what you’ve brought money for. Give your kids a budget, and require them to return items that exceed their limit.
If you experience a situation when something has to be returned and you leave it with an employee, let your kids witness you expressing appreciation for their work. Teach your children that retail employees are human beings who deserve the same respect as any other person.
