Teachers are really unsung heroes in society. They’re underpaid for the work they do, and underappreciated for what we put them through.
They take our kids — the perfect angels, the rebels, the arguers, the awkward ones, the daydreamers, the class clowns, the angry ones, the fighters, the geniuses and the uninterested — and mix two dozen or so of them in a room for an hour and somehow force an actual hour of education into them. And we expect that they do it with a professional demeanor, even when our kids make that a challenge.
Outside the classroom, though, they can drop that professional demeanor on occasion and tell us what they really think. Here’s what high school teachers on Reddit say they’d tell your teen if they could.
Being Nice Will Get You Everywhere.
Several teachers chimed in to say that their students don’t seem to realize being nice to each other is a complete life hack.
One said, “I’d let you get away with so much more if you were actually a decent person who treated others with kindness and respect.”
Another replied, “Absolutely this. Kids would be surprised by how much freedom they could get if they all tried to be nice to each other.”
Others noted that good behavior and caring demeanor can also make a teacher a little more gentle in grading.
Crushed Together
Many teachers admitted that they notice crushes within the classes and will put those students together for pair or group work on purpose. Some said they do it to spice up a boring day with some “drama,” but others offered reasons more related to productivity and peace.
“I noticed you try harder on your work when she is around,” one teacher said, adding that the students in question became good friends and improved their grades, though they never dated.
School Is Important, But Maybe Not The Way You Think
One teacher said the following:
“You can be unsuccessful at school but successful in life. I pretend that it is important for you to do well in my subject, but in reality, you’ll most probably find your niche in life and be reasonably content or hopefully extremely happy.”
Others admitted to thinking their subject or class is the most important one their students take, but at least a few said that their subject is actually important in a different way than their students think.
“You don’t need anything I teach you to be successful in life. Math is about learning to think, not graphing functions and solving equations,” one teacher explained.
No, We Don’t Agree With All The School Rules
Teachers can’t always admit to their students when they agree that a rule is unfair or unproductive.
Several teachers chimed in to say that they don’t mind kids listening to music through headphones while they work and acknowledged that some people are more productive that way.
Many said they wished kids who broke specific rules — like headphones or eating in class — wouldn’t be so obvious about it. They explained that if they see the rule-breaking, they have to act on it, and they could ignore it if their students weren’t so bad at hiding it.
Teachers’ Pets
Teachers shared various private opinions about students who get labeled “teacher’s pet” or “favorite.”
One said that, of course, they have favorite students, but that they’d deny it if asked. Another said teachers’ pets are annoying because they “would rat me out” if the teacher just gave the class a free day sometimes.
Perhaps the best policy offered was from the teacher who said, “I tell my students that, of course, every teacher has favorites, but we don’t have a quota. There is always room for more. Then I tell them the characteristics I really like in students, like authenticity and perseverance.”
They Have Opinions On Your Other Teachers
One teacher admitted, “Yes, we are fully aware that (x teacher) is incompetent/mean/stupid,” but explained that they must maintain a unified front, so they can’t admit it to the students.
Similarly, teachers explained that they cannot openly agree with a student that a principal, member of administration, or the School Board did something awful. They are required to back up the school’s policies and the administration, but that doesn’t mean they don’t fight some of it out of your sight.
They Know So Many Of The Things You Think You’re Sneaking
Teachers said they know when the kids are hitting vapes in the classroom, even when the student claims that a cloud of smoke is his Chromebook malfunctioning. They’re not falling for it.
It’s not just vaping, either. Teachers notice when their students come to class under the influence of substances, whether by smell or behavior.
One teacher explained, “Also, all the things you think your parents and teachers don’t know about? We do. We’ve done it all. We just would prefer not to think about you doing it because you’re much too young.”
Multiple teachers who teach in English and have students with other native languages said they’ve learned some of the insults in those other languages just by paying attention and now know when their students are mocking them or using unkind words in other languages. However, the kids think they’re being slick.
We Heard That
Teachers have dropped in to say that a lot goes on in the classroom that they pretend not to hear but definitely picked up on.
The things they’ve overheard and pretended not to notice can be pretty disheartening, including a hungry teen girl bargaining with a boy to buy her a burger. Others report hearing more than they’d like to about their students’ love lives, party habits, and personal struggles.
“We just choose our battles,” one said, then admitted that sometimes they don’t speak up because they thought the comment was funny and they’re afraid they’d crack up if they tried to address it.
Pick A New Path, Please
Teachers say they can tell who is heading for problems. They also predicted that some kids will never be able to hold a job unless they decide to take on more responsibility than they’re currently showing.
More than one teacher pointed to the parent as the cause, with one saying, “Your parents…think they can protect you from all the evils of the outside world, including responsibility,” and another declaring, “I’m sorry your parents failed you.”
Another said parents have cursed some students with “a sense of entitlement” and that parent-teacher conferences are useless when the parents blame the teachers for all their kids’ problems.
They Really Do Care
Nobody is getting rich teaching high school. If your teacher hasn’t left, it’s probably because they genuinely care about what they’re doing and about you.
One said, “To all highschoolers I teach, you’re dumb, but I do love you guys.”
Another added, “I [redacted] hate my job and the only reason I stay is because I do love my students.”
Yet another threw in, “I LOVE the kids. Their parents often [are not so great], though.”