The Oscar-winning actress admits her girls will cringe at the confession — but the science says she’s onto something real
Nicole Kidman has a standing daily requirement for her teenage daughters, Sunday Rose and Faith Margaret: a two-minute hug, no exceptions. The Oscar-winning actress made the admission with full awareness that her girls would not exactly be thrilled about the world knowing.
“Both my daughters will kill me for saying this,” Kidman told People, laughing as she described the ritual. The confession landed with parents everywhere precisely because it captures something so universal — a mother holding on just a little longer than her teenagers would prefer, and doing it anyway.
The Science Behind Why This Works
What Kidman is doing, instinctively, aligns with decades of research on physical affection and adolescent development. When a parent and child embrace, both bodies release oxytocin, the bonding hormone that lowers cortisol and reduces anxiety.
For teenagers managing the pressures of school, friendships, and identity, that daily physical reassurance from a parent functions as a genuine emotional anchor.
The duration matters too. A brief, perfunctory pat on the back does not produce the same neurological response as a sustained embrace. Longer contact gives the nervous system time to shift into a calmer state, which is why many pediatric psychologists encourage parents to resist rushing physical affection even when schedules are packed.
Teenagers naturally push back against parental closeness as part of their drive toward independence, but that resistance does not mean they have outgrown the need for it.
Research on adolescent development consistently shows that teens who receive regular physical affection from caregivers report higher self-esteem, lower rates of depression, and stronger feelings of security at home. The eye roll and the need for the hug can coexist.
Nicole Kidman’s Family Life and Why This Moment Stands Out
Sunday Rose and Faith Margaret are Kidman’s daughters with her husband, country music star Keith Urban. The family is known for keeping a relatively private home life despite both parents being major public figures, which makes Kidman’s candid glimpse into their daily routine all the more notable.
Her insistence on a daily two-minute hug with Sunday Rose and Faith Margaret is a small but deliberate act of parenting intentionality. Rather than waiting for her daughters to initiate affection on their own terms, she builds the ritual into the day’s structure, making it a given rather than something that only happens when everyone is in the right mood.
That consistency is what child development experts point to as the real power of routines like this. When affection is predictable rather than conditional, children and teenagers internalize the message that they are loved not because of their behavior on any particular day, but simply because they exist in your life.
How To Build Your Own Daily Affection Ritual
Not every family is a hugging family, and physical affection looks different across cultures, personalities, and ages. What matters most is that your child feels seen and valued in ways that resonate with them.
Here are several approaches that parenting experts and researchers support:
The Shoulder Squeeze or Side Hug: For teenagers who find full-frontal hugs a bit much, a quick hand on the shoulder or a side-by-side embrace conveys the same emotional signal without feeling overwhelming. Meeting your teen where they are physically is a form of respect that actually strengthens the bond.
High Fives and Fist Bumps: Especially with younger children and tweens, playful physical contact, like a celebratory high five after a good grade, communicates pride and connection without the awkwardness a hug might carry at certain ages.
The Goodbye and Hello Ritual: Making a consistent habit of a hug or kiss when your child leaves for school and returns home creates a reliable emotional checkpoint in the day. Kidman’s two-minute rule is essentially a formalized version of this — a daily moment that communicates, without words, that a child is loved.
Sitting Close During Screen Time: Simply choosing to sit next to your child on the couch while watching a show, rather than across the room, is a low-pressure form of physical closeness that many kids find comforting. Proximity matters even without active cuddling.
Back Rubs and Head Scratches: Gentle touch during calm moments — a back rub at bedtime, a head scratch while reading together — activates the parasympathetic nervous system and promotes feelings of safety. Many pediatric sleep specialists recommend this as part of a wind-down routine for younger children.
Why This Matters For Parents Of Teens
Parents of teenagers often quietly grieve the years when their kids ran toward them with open arms.
The shift toward independence that happens in adolescence can feel like rejection, but developmental psychologists are consistent on this point: your teenager still needs your physical presence and affection, even when every signal they send seems to say otherwise.
Nicole Kidman’s willingness to be the embarrassing mom who insists on the hug anyway is not just charming — it is a model worth borrowing. The science says keep holding on. Apparently, so does Nicole Kidman.
